Monster Fight: Can You Tell An Energy Drink From An Aquarium?

Can you guess which brand is throwing its trademark power around with reckless disregard for common sense or possible confusion? That’s right. Monster. Only in this case it’s Monster Energy Drinks, whose legal team had apparently gone dormant after a streak of losses, rather than Monster Cable, whose legal team felt the average consumer couldn’t tell the difference between an overpriced cable and a deer salt lick.

The Consumerist brings us the news that Monster (the Energy Drink) is looking to add to its streak of windmills tilted at, this time going after the Monster Aquaria Network, under the belief that somehow innocent people looking for a pick-me-up beverage are ending up with extremely large fish tanks instead.

Further details of the cease and desist order can be found at the site set up by the Monster Aquaria Network to apprise its fans and customers of the situation. In addition to insisting that the Aquaria Network immediately cease usage of the word “Monster” and the letter “M,” Monster Energy Drinks apparently feels it has staked a claim to certain colors:

Monster Energy sent a series of demands including, but not limited to, abandoning the trademark applications for the MonsterFishKeepers “M” symbol marks as well as ceasing to use those marks in connection with apparel & accessories, refraining from using or applying for any marks containing the word “Monster” or the letter “M,” refraining from using the colors black & green on any MonsterFishKeepers.com or Monster Aquaria Network Websites or in connection with apparel & accessories, and pay Monster Energy Corporation its attorneys’ fees in connection with this matter.

Despite having used its stylized devil’s-horns-and-tail “M” since 2005 and having registered this mark in 2007, Monster Energy still believes that it owns any iteration of “Monster” or the letter “M” in relation to… well, pretty much anything, I imagine. At least when it went after Vermonster Beer, it was in the same neighborhood (i.e. drinkable beverages). Of course, Monster was shamed into calling off its legal dogs after a bout of bad publicity and MonsterFishKeepers is obviously hoping the same happens here. If not, things don’t look good AT ALL for MonsterFishKeepers, considering the legal system is routinely gamed by aggressive companies who know they can simply run their opponents out of money.

We strongly believe that the law is on MonsterFishKeepers.com’s side, but MonsterFishKeepers.com will not be able to fund the legal proceedings that would be needed to resolve this dispute with Monster Energy. Unfortunately for MonsterFishKeepers.com, Monster Energy can file an unlimited number of appeals even if MonsterFishKeepers.com wins the first round of the case; in the end, Monster Energy would certainly outlast MonsterFishKeepers.com in the legal proceedings after MonsterFishKeepers.com runs out of money since there is no way that such a small company could compete with such a large company in terms of legal fees.

MonsterFishKeepers hope to expedite this public shaming via a petition at change.org, in addition to providing contact information for Monster Energy Drinks at its website. Hopefully, this will result in a speedy retraction of the cease and desist, as there is no way Monster Energy sincerely believes MonsterFishKeepers is diverting morons in a hurry. This is simply a bully wandering the internet playground picking fights and shaking down smaller kids for lunch money.

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